The Mirror of Erised
by FrozenPrincess
Summary: Snape has an encounter with the mirror. Short one chapter story.


The mirror was a tale that Severus Snape was vaguely aware of- and the knowledge he did possess of the mirror made him certain he never wished to see it ever in his life. He was afraid of what he might see, of the niggling little voice in the back of his head that whispered he might see her. It was not a fear of Lily Evans (for he could never bring himself to use disgusting Potter's name in reference to his Lily) that kept him from the mirror, but rather a sense that if he saw her, once he saw her, he would never be able to bring himself to leave her-again.

So it was curious that Dumbledore should come to him, and, in an offhanded way, mention that the mirror was in fact in this very school. There was a strange twinkle in Dumbledore's eyes as he informed Severus of this, the barest hint of curiosity, and then he left. Dumbledore had always been fond of the hidden plans, agendas that one could barely see in his eyes- a glimpse, and nothing more. With the knowledge that Dumbledore was most likely trying to manipulate Snape into an action that he would most definitely come to regret, it was firmly that Snape swore to himself he would not go looking for the mirror. He decided that he would never see hide nor hair of this hideous object which promised so much pain. Unfortunately for Severus Snape, Fate had other plans.

It was a Tuesday, dank and overcast as the weather often was at this time of year. Few children braved the outdoors, forcing their idiotic romping to be preformed indoors. The Gryffindor children were, as always, the worst of the lot, and it gave Snape great pleasure to reprimand them. As he swooped through the halls, taking away house points right and left, somehow he got turned around and found himself somewhere that he did not recognize. He, Severus Snape, was lost. It was absolutely ridiculous- he had spent over half of his life in this castle, first as a student, then as a teacher. He should know the place by heart by now. Alas, he did not, and he found himself wandering the corridors in confusion. Snape, lost! The idea was preposterous. Nevertheless, it was true, and so it was in a state of shock that Snape turned a corner, entered a doorway and found himself face-to-face with the dreaded mirror, the very thing he had tried so hard to avoid. His mind screamed at him to leave now, before it was too late, before the danger was too great, but it was as if his feet had forgotten they belonged to him. They wandered forward, dragging a poor, resisting Severus Snape along with them. Slowly, he found himself struggling less and less as the prospect of seeing Lily Evans grew before him. There was no use in hiding it any more- it was no longer his feet pulling him forwards, it was the desperate desire to see her again, filling every part of his being. He had managed to keep himself cold and separate from the idea, using logic and reason to combat love, but his well-structured mind faltered and failed to form an argument strong enough to keep him from her any longer, now that he was so close. He wanted her- and he knew he could never have her. It didn't matter.

Then he was there- positioned just so in front of the mirror that he could see her staring back at him. It was worse than he could have ever imagined. It was being torn asunder and being sewn back together again- it was holding her dead body in his arms, it was watching her marry that bastard Potter. It was pure agony and pure bliss- because he could see her again. He could see the way her eyes lit up and the way her smile changed her whole face and the flash of hair- God, that hair! So much more than a moving photograph, this was his Lily, her essence, right in front of him- never having loved Potter, nor sacrificing herself for another, she was alive and well in his arms, as it should have been. His childhood playmate who had opened his eyes and then torn out his heart was right there in front of him- and he would never leave her. He couldn't, not ever. It could have been hours that he stood there, just staring at her, drinking her in.

"Severus." There was a sound behind him, and Dumbledore's soft voice rose through the dust, through the hours he had spent in a single position, to reach him. It barely penetrated through his daze. "Severus."

A black cloth fell over the mirror and Lily vanished from sight, torn once again from the man who loved her. A sharp pang shot through Snape's chest and he gasped, but he was free from her spell, free to control his own body again.

"I recently had to pry a young mister Potter away from this mirror. I had hoped not to have to do it again, but it seems you were just as enthralled by the mirror as he. In that case, I am going to tell you the same thing I told him- I'm moving this mirror to help protect the thing we are guarding, and there will be no need to come looking for it again. If you did, I am not entirely certain it would work the same way either." He did not wait for acknowledgment, merely drifted out the door, murmuring softly. "So similar, to be captured by the mirror. Have to wonder if they were seeing the same thing. Just something to keep in mind." The comment was meant for Snape, but the man was in no mood to listen to Dumbledore's ramblings.

A chill force had swept over Snape, who was still unmoved from the spot where he had stood for hours. His face was damp from tears he did not remember crying, his front soaked from where they had dripped off his face. He pivoted slowly on the spot, turning from the mirror. He could not have left her by choice, but he would not foolishly entrap himself in this misery again. He did not wish to leave her, but he had to. The truth came intruding back into his logical brain, and this time it stuck. The truth was that she was dead, never coming back. He hardened his head and started away from the mirror. Still he could feel her pull on him, calling him back to her. He made himself cold and uncaring. The pull faded. Lily Evans was a dead girl who had never loved him, and Severus Snape was a cold, bitter man that didn't look back.


End file.
